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Need some help please

ralord82276 🚫

Apparently my age is beginning to catch up with me...sigh.

I read a story recently (within the last year although not sure when story was posted) and now I can only remember 1 specific thread from that story and no other details.

What I remember is the MC decided to play football. He was extremely agile, fast, smart, and due to (I believe) extreme levels of martial arts training he was extraordinarily strong and could shrug off severe hits. However, he convinced his coach and team to allow him to hide his strength and durability by using his agility and speed to make plays on the field and simply "take a knee" or run out of bounds if it looked like he was about to get tackled. This gave him the nickname of "the Wimp" in sports circles...but was actually in preparation for the playoffs allowing his team to use his strength and durability in special plays in critical games in order to win.

For the life of me, that is all I remember. I might remember other portions but can't make the connections that would allow me to say they were part of the same story.

This is driving me bonkers because I normally have a much better (and longer term) memory than this... I can't even say whether this was the main plot thread of the story or a side thread.

Can anyone please help me identify this story?

Replies:   limab  FantasyLover  XofDallas
limab 🚫
Updated:

@ralord82276

Ernest Bywater's Finding Home. The game is in Chapter 25

Good Hunting, limab

Replies:   ralord82276
ralord82276 🚫
Updated:

@limab

Thank You!!

Want to know the really terrible thing? Once I read the synopsis, I recognized the story. Have read it 3 times...last time was only a month ago. I actually remember almost every detail...except that my brain for some reason wasn't connecting Al's football plays with the rest of the story. UGH!! My brain really is starting to crap out on me.

Thanks again for the assist.

Replies:   limab  fasteddiecoder
limab 🚫

@ralord82276

You too? Sucks, don't it.

limab

fasteddiecoder 🚫

@ralord82276

Of all the things I have misplaced, it my mind I miss the most

Replies:   ralord82276
ralord82276 🚫

@fasteddiecoder

"Lost: 1 tired, highly-used, possibly broken brain. If found, DO NOT APPROACH!! Call for back-up immediately! Lost brain has been identified as degenerate, slightly unstable and unreliable. Answers to various aliases: Huh? Idanhfnbablah? Ummm... and (most frequently used) UGH!"

Replies:   FantasyLover  redlion75
FantasyLover 🚫

@ralord82276

When I lose mine, I usually find it somewhere in a gutter.

redlion75 🚫

@ralord82276

Uh you might try looking for it in the white house inside the president's head

FantasyLover 🚫

@ralord82276

Sorry, I might be depraved, but nowhere near as the mildest politician, and the higher up they aspire to reach, the worse they are, regardless of party.

Replies:   ralord82276  garymrssn
ralord82276 🚫

@FantasyLover

You know that most political elections are held around the beginning of November in the US ... which explains why October is considered the Month of Horror! Not because it culminates in Halloween but because of all the political advertisements, rallies, debates and other political BS we have to put up with constantly during that month.
Politics = Poli + tics
Poli = indicates a plurality, many
Tics = form of noun used to identify certain external blood-sucking parasites

garymrssn 🚫

@FantasyLover

the higher up they aspire to reach, the worse they are

A corollary to Lord Acton's' postulate.

"The pursuit of power corrupts in proportion to the power pursued." CML

Gary

XofDallas 🚫
Updated:

@ralord82276

Politics (defined): The pursuit or exercise of power with respect to matters of governance.

Politician (defined): Lowest form of life in the food-chain, although damnlawyers, journalists, media news personalities and talking heads, and most professors in the humanities and/or social sciences will, at times, compete vigorously for that spot.

Replies:   remarcsd
remarcsd 🚫

@XofDallas

Politician: someone who tells you what is popular, whether it is true or not.

Statesman: somone who tells you what is true, whether it is popular or not

awnlee jawking 🚫

@remarcsd

Statesman: somone who tells you what is true, whether it is popular or not

Coincidentally, I've just penned my own definition of Statesman elsewhere. A 'great statesman' is someone who comes out a loser in negotiations.

AJ

Replies:   The Outsider
The Outsider 🚫

@awnlee jawking

Is this similar to the Peter Principle? "You are promoted to the level of your own incompetence?"

XofDallas 🚫

@remarcsd

Really like your definitions!

Replies:   Sparky-1953
Sparky-1953 🚫

@XofDallas

🚫
4

I really like Heinlein's definition of an honest politician: one who stays bought.

Replies:   Dominions Son
Dominions Son 🚫

@Sparky-1953

I really like Heinlein's definition of an honest politician

My definition of "honest politician": A mythical creature that does not exist, much like a unicorn.

Replies:   Pixy
Pixy 🚫

@Dominions Son

A mythical creature that does not exist, much like a unicorn.

Of course unicorns exist! That's why they are Scotland's national animal. You think whisky is made from a mix of barley and water? You are actually drinking unicorn piss...

Replies:   awnlee jawking
awnlee jawking 🚫

@Pixy

That's why they are Scotland's national animal.

I heard that on a recent episode of NCIS. I thought that was a joke.

I guess Scotland doesn't have any start-ups with a value of a billion.

AJ

Replies:   Tom D
Tom D 🚫
Updated:

@awnlee jawking

I heard that on a recent episode of NCIS. I thought that was a joke.

I guess Scotland doesn't have any start-ups with a value of a billion.

No joke. As a Scot, it has been part of our culture and mythology for a long time.

From

The unicorn: a mystical beast, representing both purity and innocence, power and ferocity, adopted as the national animal of Scotland in the 1300s. The unicorn is also the natural enemy of the lion, adopted by English royalty some 100 years before…


That was why one appeared at Hogwarts, which is somewhere in the Scottish Highlands

Replies:   limab
limab 🚫

@Tom D

Someone I know put forth the supposition that if the description was passed through several people and someone squints REALLY hard the rhinoceros is a viable source animal for a unicorn. There is an extinct variant from Siberia that matched even closer.

Dinsdale 🚫

@limab

So the Scots are refugees from Siberia?

Replies:   Pixy
Pixy 🚫

@Dinsdale

Plate tectonics. Scotland didn't use to be where it is now.

Replies:   Dinsdale
Dinsdale 🚫

@Pixy

I know plate tectonics are responsible for India ramming Asia - and creating the Himalayas - but shifting part of Siberia to Scotland must have taken a massive cue ball, and a short cut through the North Pole.

Replies:   awnlee jawking  Radagast
awnlee jawking 🚫

@Dinsdale

Scotland is well-travelled. It's been near the South Pole and at the equator.

AJ

Replies:   Sparky-1953
Sparky-1953 🚫

@awnlee jawking

Yes, but it probably hasn't move twenty miles since humans arrived there. Plate tectonics is slowww. If anything, their ancestors may have seen something during their migrations.

Radagast 🚫

@Dinsdale

The Appalachians used to be part of Scotland and Ireland. I assume the geographic similarity is why the Scots-Irish settled there.

Harold Wilson 🚫

@limab

Real unicorns have curves!

palamedes 🚫

@limab

Someone I know put forth the supposition that if the description was passed through several people and someone squints REALLY hard the rhinoceros is a viable source animal for a unicorn. There is an extinct variant from Siberia that matched even closer.

Elasmotherium sibiricum was a type of rihno (horn on the forehead not the nose) that lived during the time of the mammoths. There is a belief that drawings of this animal would look like a horse with a horn and that this is a possible source of the unicorn. Elasmotherium sibiricum fossils show that the animal weighed between 8,000 and 10,000 pounds and with dating placing extinction some 39,000 years ago they where sharing Eurasia with both modern humans and Neanderthals.

Replies:   awnlee jawking
awnlee jawking 🚫

@palamedes

Elasmotherium sibiricum was a type of rihno (horn on the forehead not the nose)

I can see how that wouldn't be popular. How could a male fuck a female with his forehead protuberance while simultaneously giving her cunnilingus? A nasal protuberance would be much more effective.

AJ

Replies:   Dominions Son
Dominions Son 🚫

@awnlee jawking

I can see how that wouldn't be popular. How could a male fuck a female with his forehead protuberance while simultaneously giving her cunnilingus? A nasal protuberance would be much more effective.

A nasal protuberance that is perpendicular to the jaw bones wouldn't be any more effective than a forehead protuberance.

Replies:   awnlee jawking
awnlee jawking 🚫

@Dominions Son

A nasal protuberance that is perpendicular to the jaw bones wouldn't be any more effective than a forehead protuberance.

And you know that how?

As I see it, a nasal protuberance sticking out horizontally would allow the tongue to be in range of the clitoris when the protuberance is fully invaginated. Perhaps someone could get AI to draw a picture ;-)

AJ

Replies:   Dominions Son
Dominions Son 🚫

@awnlee jawking

As I see it, a nasal protuberance sticking out horizontally

Since the consideration up thread was unicorns and rihnos, the horns are vertical not horizontal.

Replies:   awnlee jawking
awnlee jawking 🚫

@Dominions Son

Given the curvature of rhinoceros horns, invagination would likely cause significant internal damage.

AJ

Replies:   LonelyDad
LonelyDad 🚫

@awnlee jawking

Not to mention the whole size problem (length of horn vs length of vagina).

Replies:   awnlee jawking
awnlee jawking 🚫

@LonelyDad

Not to mention the whole size problem (length of horn vs length of vagina).

This is SOL. If they're man enough, males can fit their whole twelve inches inside a four-inch vagina :-)

AJ

Replies:   Pixy
Pixy 🚫

@awnlee jawking

This is SOL. If they're man enough, males can fit their whole twelve inches inside a four-inch vagina

Ahhh, TARDIS syndrome. Time And Relative Dimensions In Sex....

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