Chapter 169

1234 hours, local time
Wednesday, 3 September, 2014
Wichita State University
Wichita, KS

“So, you’re the famous Prophet, Adam Clarke. I’m Dr. Mallard Doyle, the President of Wichita State University. This is Dr. Frederick Hernandez, the Provost. This is Dr. Arlen Schulman, the Dean of Men. This is Dr. Ebony Chambers, the Dean of Women. These are the department heads and the senior and tenured professors. I see that the city fathers have already given you the keys to the city in a very real sense of the word,” the university president, a short, thin, bespectacled man, introduced himself and the top tier of his faculty to us.

“I am said Prophet, of course. Adam Clarke, no less. These are my wives, co-husbands, and futa-wives. Xia Delan, Hannah, Autumn, Bonnie, Becca, Sardha, Raquel, Till, Ryan, Tara, Leah, Kelly, Kylie, Diana, Barry, Yitzhak, Sarai, Stacy, Evie, Charity, Cassandra, Emma, Miranda, Natalie, Jessica, Julie, Tania, Stephanie, Vera, Athenais, Tina, Penny, Loretta, Lorraine, Robin, Jeanette, Lindsay, Arsinoe, Dawn, Stacey, Wendy, Stevie, Mary, Elaine, Elise, Ashley, Paula, Gina, Erica, Delta, Regina, Adelaide, Doreen, Melusine, Wanda, Rani, Abigail, Billie, Petra, Envy, Karen, Marina, Ivy, Lynne, Janice, Quinoa, Percy, Fatima, Annie, Bobbie, Edda, Candice, Rose, Julia, Rory, Sonali, Trish, Annabeth, Emily, Mara, Melina, Violeta, Alice, Honey, Desiree, Ambrosia, Lisa, Selene, Helen, Amelia, Samantha, Lenore, Salwa, Hamna, Hujja, Michelle, Edith, Pilar, Anne-Marie, Mireille, Monique, Francoise, Ameena, Urwa, Laila, Hamsa, Nasreen, Tala, Shahida, Hikma, Iffat, Nahla, and Jasra,” I confirmed just how polygamous I truly was, even if some wives were busy with nursery duties as usual.

“Well, that’s very old school prophet of you in a way, not that I object. Your movement is gaining ground left and right in many areas, from what we’ve heard, and this does seem to confirm that fact. So, we should infer from your apparent prophetic career that all prior religious traditions got it wrong, at least on some articles of faith. Then again, so did the atheists, didn’t we? Yes, I was an atheist until Fireball Day, though born, baptized, and confirmed your typical, quintessential Irish Catholic. I even attended a Jesuit seminary for a hot minute there,” Dr, Doyle informed me as I noticed that our guided tour of the campus began at the administrative offices.

“You intended to become a Catholic priest? That must have been a real catharsis that turned you away from Rome, right?” I observed, even as we saw his secretary winking at us and throwing some panties at me.

This development shouldn’t have caught me off guard by now, yet somehow it did. As we passed by more office cubicles, even more women did the same thing, as if by telepathic accord with the ones before them. My wives made a point of catching each pair of undies and hanging on whatever they could use. It was evident that I was at least the temporary cock of the walk, which was heady wine, though hardly novel by now. I would clearly have breeding duties at least one last time during my westward trek.

As we left the administration building and walked out into the open air, many more girls and women tossed their panties at me and at my feet as if I was Tom Jones or something. I always thought it ironic that a longtime married pop star like him was seen as a sex symbol, but life was never short of irony, wss it? Then again, he wasn’t known for rejecting groupies, was he? That reminded me to ask later if he survived Doomsday, just as many did about plenty of others.

“He didn’t. He and his wife both perished when Los Angeles was destroyed. God made both of them angels, of course. Incidentally, I now have verified that Scarlett Johansson and Topher Grace died on or since Fireball Day. So did Blair Brown, Donald Moffat, Richard Schiff, Aisha Tyler, Chris Cooper, Demi Lovato, John Malkovich, Billy Currington, Woody Harrelson, Rupert Everett, James Caan, Kathy Bates, Luke Perry, Jon Voight, Jonny Lee Miller, Tobey Maguire, Sam Waterston, Martin Sheen, Cristina Milian, Gene Simmons, Kennedy, Jayne Heitmeyer, Shannon Tweed, Jon Cusack, Emma Thompson, Fred Willard, David Hyde Pierce, Bill Moyers, Madonna, Kevin Eubanks, Carrie Underwood, Gina Gershon, Jason Biggs, Albert Brooks, and Eric Idle. All of these are angels now, too, with plenty of surprises for most of them,” a new angel that I instantly recognized told me now.

Greta Scacchi ... wait, why was she dead? The others certainly noticed her, too, including her nudity and her rejuvenated, celestial body. There was no question in my mind, anyway. The ravishing international actress winked at me and collected all of the underwear, though only to burn it in the open, in broad daylight. All of my hosts shivered as they realized that this was no prank. An actual angel directly communicated information to me from the Most High God. Her being a celebrity of any kind was icing on the vindication cake.

“That’s a bit of a shock, naturally. I didn’t even know that you perished! Was it Fireball Day or after the fact?” I inquired of the lady in question, never an A-lister in Hollywood, but sensual and elegant in every role.

“I was killed in Liverpool recently, hanged as a ‘loose woman’ by their esteemed leader there ... under Sharia law. Sarita Choudhury is at risk of the same fate now. We both acted in prominent roles that offended his eminence or whatever. Then I was resurrected as an angel and here I am. Helluva thing, wouldn’t you say, love?” Greta explained to me, even as certain guys approached her and she instantly smote them dead.

“Were they?” I started to ask her ... at which point she put her fingers to my lips.

“Darling, trust me, I’m here on a special assignment for this phase of your little journey. After that, it’s up to Him ... you know ... God! I never would have expected God to have that high an opinion of me, but then he was an actor when he was a mere mortal. That tracks, doesn’t it? In any case, here I am. People, do not make another attempt on this man’s life or any of his tribe. If you do, I will smite you dead just as I did with these folks who tried to abduct me. Heed this prophecy or prepare to die!” Greta confirmed to me that those earlier dudes were thugs, punks, or goons.